Alls Well When Read (and Watched) #3: Review Round Up
We have demons, trauma, and all kinds of other stuff this time around!
Greetings!
Happy October, everyone! I love talking about shows, movies, and books during this time of year because there’s not only a ton of new scary stuff to dissect, but because there’s also just a ton of junk. I’m using the term very, very loosely here because I don’t mean that any of the junk is bad (not all of it anyways) or a waste of time, but that there usually is just SO much stuff getting cranked out and it’s impossible to keep up — but we can sure damn try!
*Cue the episode of King of the Hill where Bobby freaks out and faints because he pop cultured himself out*
This year is no different. We’re only 6 days into October and we’ve had a plethora (a complete mess, actually) of stuff to consume. Between things like Dahmer and a remake of Interview with the Vampire, there’s so much to talk to talk about.
SO, let’s dive in with some reviews of the most recent things I’ve watched. As always, tell me what you’ve seen, what you plan to see, and about the things you absolutely loved or hated.
Movies I Watched
1. Blonde
I really wanted to say something different than everyone else but you better believe all the reviews: Blonde is completely dependent on exploitation and obsession with a person’s trauma and weaknesses. Basically, it’s about 3 hours worth of fetishization and the weirdest form of idolization (if you can even think of this content as idolization).
To keep this short (and to stop myself from any cussing out of frustration), I’ll just say that this film could’ve been executed SO differently. With the depth Marilyn Monroe had, there was NO reason to feature 3 hours of pain, sadness, and trauma. It doesn’t matter that this was based off a book either — bad content is just bad content and filmmakers should’ve known better.
See it or skip it? SKIP IT. Blonde doesn’t need any more attention than it’s already getting.
2. Smile
I initially thought that the creepy people with toothy smiles featured in advertisements for Smile came off as super cheesy. But, when I finally saw the movie (in Dolby, which is super important to add here), my significant other and I almost shit ourselves.
So, did I underestimate it? YES.
Smile is completely different than the usual demon films we’re used to — there’s no overload on religion, stuff about good vs. bad, or a story of a family living in an infested house. Instead, its depth comes from the fact that it’s purposefully messy, constantly provoking us with what it’s like to carry the weight of anxiety, trauma, and mental illness while trying to live a normal life.
When you mix all that real life terrifying stuff with a ton of jump scares and a creature you’ve probably only seen in your nightmares, you have a movie that leaves you feeling very complicated. You’re angry about everything the main character went through and how her crisis was handled, but you’re also glad that it wasn’t you that had to deal with that kind of creature.
See it or skip it? SEE IT. SEE IT. SEE IT.
And then keep your light on while you sleep.
3. My Best Friend’s Exorcism
Who knew that 1980’s, bubblegum nostalgia could get so dark? My Best Friend’s Exorcism, based off of Grady Hendrix’s novel of the same name, proves that it’s not pimples, unpopularity, or puberty that is a teen’s biggest threat — it’s demons. DUN DUN DUN.
Because I enjoyed the book so much, I thought I was going to love the movie. But, it ended up being just OKAY. The pacing was a little too fast for my liking, and I felt that a lot of the things that made the book so magical were glossed over because of that. Also, we’re talking about a demon invading a young girl’s body — that isn’t a one and done kind of thing! The details surrounding the exorcism itself could’ve been slowed down a bit to add more scariness to the climax.
See it or skip it? Meh, see it. It’s definitely not the worst thing you’ll see, and you’ll probably get a few smiles and chuckles out of it.
Shows I Watched
1. Dahmer
If you thought I wouldn’t watch and review Ryan Murphy’s Dahmer, you were wrong. There’s so much I can say about this show (probably not much different than what other people have said), but I’m going to do my best to sum up all my thoughts into brief bullets because no one wants to keep reading about the same gory details over and over.
So, what did I think?
The show was too easy on Jeffrey Dahmer
The murders were bad enough — why all the dramatizations?
If you’re no stranger to Ryan Murphy’s past work, then you’ll know he’s not above significant dramatizations. He loves putting on the dramatics for entertainment sake but with Dahmer, this didn’t need to happen. Jeffrey Dahmer was a (excuse my language) shit ass person and a case like his should never happen again. Those are the only things people should've learned from the show — not this complicated feelings baloney or “Wow, I can’t believe his parents abandoned him. No wonder he killed.” It’s plain and simple: he was an evil person who did evil things. No excuses.
See it or skip it? SKIP IT (even though I know many of you won’t listen).
Save your eyes and ears from having to witness these atrocities.
What to Read
1. Big Red
“Big Red” by Jerome Charyn is a devotional to Rita Hayworth, Orson Welles, and the Old Hollywood world they were part of, all told through starry-eyed narrator, Rusty Redford. His brilliant use of language paints a bittersweet picture of Hayworth’s complex life, showing that she was a tender woman that had dreams, hopes, and wishes despite the constant objectification, self-doubt, and inner turmoil she endured.
The strongest thing about Big Red is that Charyn utilizes a unique perspective with Rusty to tell not only Hayworth’s story, but to frame the entirety of 1940’s Hollywood. It’s through Rusty’s narration that we can finally understand what a conversation with Louella Parsons or working at a movie studio would be like, or just how much people worshipped movie stars. We’re taken right into the mix and are existing in those moments with Rusty.
Basically, historical fiction doesn’t get much better than this.
You can get Big Red here.