Alls Well When Read (and Watched) #5: Scares Galore
Halloween is HERE! Check out some of my featured films and shows this week and get your spook on at home.
Happy Halloween everyone!
I’m sad to see the Halloween season go because it seems like it just came and went so quickly! And, if you’re anything like me, you’ll probably have the heaviest orange and black seasonal hangover tomorrow (even though many of us have been prepping for this special day for months).
To wrap up Halloween on a good note, I decided to make this week’s letter special with Scares Galore. Every film and show featured below is unsettling, eerie, and will send chills to your bones (except maybe like one of them but that’s for you to read below).
So, if you plan on staying home tonight, grab lots of good food and candy, and check out any of what’s listed below. And as always, feel free to share your thoughts!
Movies I Watched
1. Prey for the Devil (1/5)
I was really hoping Prey for the Devil wouldn’t fall under the “Just Another Possession Horror Film” category but alas, it did — and a very non-scary one at that.
In its 1 hour and 33 minutes runtime, Prey for the Devil does little more than be an amalgamation of a whole mess of plot points. Most of the points are non-committal, just used as threads that will *hopefully* create harmony for ignorant viewers (guess what: audiences are smarter than to fall for this). The points that do have the potential to go further all quickly fizzle out due to a lack of storytelling and time.
Ultimately, the disconnectedness of the story bogs down the entire film, leaving us with an unsatisfying tale and an urge to get back the time that was wasted sitting in a theater for a movie that could’ve gone straight to streaming.
2. Barbarian (No rating. I just loved it)
*Insert melting emoji here* This is one of the only films that have made me feel like ↓
I’m KIND OF cheating here because I saw this when it first came out, but Jesus Christ my feelings haven’t changed — they’ve only grown fonder. I’m going to do my best to keep this short because I don’t want to spoil this film in any way. Barbarian is a mind-bending, terrifying mess that totally disregards the three-act structure. Instead of something easy to follow and predict, we get a topsy-turvy story that is so chaotic, unbelievable, and funny but yet extremely tragic at the same time (got milk, anyone?).
To simplify this, think of Barbarian as the craziest Forensic Files episode mixed in with an I-almost-got-killed-at-my-AirBnB type of story. Sounds weird, right? Well, that’s exactly what this is and much, much more.
3. Mystery of the Wax Museum
Dare I say Mystery of the Wax Museum is better than House of Wax featuring Vincent Price? I never thought I would but it’s cutting it close!
Even if others prefer the Price version, Mystery of the Wax Museum is a pre-code gem that can hold its own thanks to the unique mixing of a macabre tale with a quick-witted whodunit. In one minute, audiences get the same icky eeriness realizing that the wax sculptures shown are dead bodies and in the next, they can be howling with laughter from Glenda Farrell’s sassiness that pops up as she’s trying to solve the case.
Yes, jokes probably shouldn’t be made when a maniac wax artist is involved but when the wisecracking comes across so naturally and classily, you won’t be able to help but love it.
Shows I Watched
1. Interview with the Vampire (4.5/5)
There is SO MUCH I want to say about AMC’s take on Interview with the Vampire but I’ll do my best to sum it allllllll up in a few sentences.
Basically, I’m so glad 25+ years have passed since the original film’s release because that’s exactly what the series needed to be successful: modernity, time, and fresh eyes to take on the content properly. Instead of going the same tacky, unflavored route (yeah, I’m looking at you, Tom Cruise), creators used time as a framing device, allowing new language and inner conflict within each character to seamlessly unveil the story. The result? A lyrical masterpiece that makes every monster’s emotions feel genuine and as if they’re happening right in front of us at that moment. We never would’ve gotten this from Tom Cruise.
If you haven’t watched it yet, kick off your Halloween evening with a few episodes! Once you start, you’ll be so invested in Louis’ and Lestat’s story that you’ll binge the entire series.
Special Mentions
1. The Uncanny (4/5)
Straight up: If you’re afraid of cats, this is only going to make you feel even more uneasy about them.
The Uncanny is a grisly horror anthology that revolves around one main theme: cats will always be smarter than us. Peter Cushing stars as a writer whose upcoming work focuses on suspicious cases of murder, children that have gone missing, and more. And spoiler alert: the cases all involve cats. The three stories featured don’t hold back on the blood, guts, and magical lore we’ve all heard about cats, serving as fables that show us we better not piss off felines or else.
As a cat lover, I adored this movie because there aren’t many times when they come out on top. Instead of having to watch them eat out of trashcans, get chased away by dogs, or get hurt by some nut, they’re the devil in disguise that we’ve underestimated all along.